Fuck Me Before Christmas

I did finish the first copy edit round of Fuck Me Before Christmas (I'm paraphrasing here), and you'll be relieved to hear that the breathtakingly handsome and brilliant thespian, Raoul Charlebois, finally unraveled the secrets of his past and discovered that, in fact, he was not the bastard he once thought he was, but rather a French comte whose loving parents had sacrificed their lives to the guillotine for him; and that Miss Sarah Jefferson, a raven-haired, ample-bosomed, gingerbread-making, twenty-one-year-old spinster and daughter-of-a-gamekeeper (not gameskeeper, people), was finally going to be getting a little somethin'-somethin', on a regular basis even.

Meanwhile, I also have a rush deadline to meet on Maneater, so I was off and running—wishing it was in the other direction—with that piece of...prose—when suddenly, via email:

"Greetings all, On Thursday, 601 (kids, no parents) will be celebrating the completion of their independent writing projects, and they are incorporating a welcome back for Ms. G. Ms. H. has put out a call for treats, drinks (lemonade, fruit punch, orange juice, apple juice—no soda) and cups. I'm going to send T. in with some mini brownies and mini muffins from Whole Foods. If you would like to send your child in with something, it will be greatly appreciated..."

I decided I was finally ready to step outside my school baking comfort-zone standbys:

• Original Nestle Toll House Chocolate Chip Cookies, from the back of the bag (http://theirreverentfamilycookbook.blogspot.com/2009/01/i-didnt-go-to-work-today.html).
  
• Baker's One Bowl Brownies, from the back of the Baker's Unsweetened Baking Chocolate Squares box (easy and fantastic, btw).
  
• Old-Fashioned Apple Crumb Cake (http://theirreverentfamilycookbook.blogspot.com/2009/02/principals-office.html).
• Gingered Gingerbread, Hay Day Country Market Cookbook, again!
  

So:

• Cinnamon Rolls with Cream Cheese Glaze, Bon Appetit, March 2008 (recipe discovered chez D.J.'s former nut allergy doctor, a very sweet, well-groomed Conan look-alike),
  

or

• Norwegian Cinnamon Buns, How to be a Domestic Goddess*?

Nigella's process was a bit horror-movie-esque, as either the recipe called for way too much liquid, or I didn't put enough flour in, 'cause the dough was a mess. In any event, I kept adding more and more flour, and it kept growing in my hands! I was sure it was a bust, and I was going to have to throw the whole thing away, but that dough had been activated, and was not slowing down. It was relentless. It was alive!

End results: impressive and delicious. Had to try before I sent off to the party, of course. Photo may not do them justice.



Wrong picture. That's D.J. as Charlie Bucket in Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, June 2008, P.S. 41, NYC.



*Recipe link: http://www.notquitenigella.com/2008/03/19/nigella-lawson-norwegian-cinnamon-buns-from-how-to-be-a-domestic-goddess/